Full Circle
by Anti-APTX
Summary: There were things between Ran and Shinichi that had changed. The Before Conan and After Conan had never been so glaringly obvious before and something needs to change before they break.
**A/N: I needed something before I lost my mind and since I couldn't find any new ShinRan or old ones that I hadn't read, I decided to write one. You have no idea how much I need something non-complicated, so I wrote one. And I need a break.**

 **All mistakes are mine.**

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Before everything got so screwed up that it was hard to decipher when Shinichi ended and Conan began, there was always one constant in Shinichi's life, his childhood friend Ran.

He could count on her for everything and anything. He admired her for the juxtaposition that she was. She could be strong yet weak. She could be stone cold dry yet be sugar sweet. In his sixteen years of life, he had never met someone like that. Mostly people fell in a criteria when it came to their personality but Ran was multifaceted. She was a puzzle that he hadn't solved and he had a hunch, that he never would. A major part of him was bristled at that fact. He was the Sherlock Holmes of modern era, there was no mystery he couldn't unravel but Ran stumped him. A teeny, tiny part of him admitted that he liked her that way. He liked knowing that there was a layer of Ran's character he hadn't peeled off yet. He liked the feeling that surged through him when he could see one of Ran's faces. He liked knowing her mind. He wanted to know what she thought about the world. He wanted to know everything about her.

And everybody around him knew that except for the subject of his contemplation herself. There were many who could see how infatuated Shinichi was with Ran and vice-versa. They knew Kudo was a quick-witted, sarcastic, cool guy. They knew Mouri was tough, pretty girl. They also knew how cynical Kudo could be and how optimistic Mouri could be. On paper, they didn't make any sense. They stood on different parts of the spectrum. But once they were around Mouri and Kudo, they could see what the rumours were talking about.

They might have been different types of people but they gravitated around each other. People around them could see the side glances they gave when the other was not looking. They could see how hard Kudo tried to cheer up Mouri when she was in a bad mood. They could see how Mouri would try to pull Kudo off from one of his deduction binges. They could see how much they treasured each other. They could see how protective they were of each other and for some people, it didn't make sense.

Both of them could do much better. Kudo would be better off with a girl who was on the same intelligence level as him, who could perform deductions, who wouldn't burst out in tears on the drop of a hat. Mouri would be better off with a guy who didn't ditch her at the word 'murder', who would be sweet and nice to her, who wouldn't hurt her with his zero emotional quotient.

And the thing was that both of them knew that. They knew they could do much better but they didn't _want_ to. Shinichi felt at peace with Ran and so did she. She was like the perfect remedy to soothe his overworking mind. He was a catalyst in making her think about the depth and wonders of human mind and how it could easily break. They brought out a part of their personality the other never knew about. It could be either negative or positive but that didn't matter because they knew that the only person they could _feel_ for was each other. But before Conan, neither was ready to take the plunge and say the words.

 **~oOo~**

After the Conan fiasco and the truth revelation about the Black Organization, a part of Ran and Shinichi withered away. Ran found it difficult to trust Shinichi and let him go on dangerous cases. Shinichi found it difficult to let Ran stray away from his sight and he found it easier to make excuses so that he could solve a case. They had changed in ways that couldn't be described as good. For the first time, Ran saw first hand how easy it would be for Shinichi to stay with someone like Ai-chan who was compatible with him in ways that Ran couldn't be. Shinichi saw how easy it was for other guys to make a move on Ran, who could admittedly take better care of her than he could. It was difficult to acknowledge for both of them that their relationship wasn't as easygoing as it had been in the past.

They knew that they loved each other but what was that kind of love? Were they deluding themselves thinking that they could stay with each other and yet have a healthy, romantic relationship?

All their doubts were quashed after a rainy day when they were eighteen.

The past few days in which Shinichi was back to normal adult size, Ran and Shinichi were in a limbo. They had fought till their throats turned raw. Ran, to both of their surprises, hadn't cried. Shinichi, on the other hand, almost did cry. The next day, they were back to best friends. The other, they were at each other's throat. And the day after that, they were almost lovers with their shy glances and brushing hands. And the circle continued. They would fight one day and be normal the other. To an outsider, their dynamic would make one's head spin.

They didn't leave each other at all. Ran was nosy about Shinichi's personal life as much as he was. They hadn't been together, with Shinichi in his adult body, enough for the past two years. Shinichi had an undue advantage of seeing Ran how she was at home. And that only complicated how he viewed Ran. Seeing her like that did make some sense as to why she was the way she was but it left more unanswered questions in him. She had surprised him when he had told her the truth. She hadn't killed him, for one. And she was oddly accepting of the truth. He was so sure that if Black Organization hadn't killed him, then Ran definitely would, but she hadn't.

He knew there were numerous times she had suspected him of being Conan and there were times where she had pushed him to tell the truth but he had lied his way out of it. So it didn't make sense when she wasn't angry. Instead she had told,

 _"I always felt that it was you, Shinichi. I am not happy that you lied to me but I can see why you did it."_

Nobody was more surprised than Shinichi when he heard that. He had listened to Ran rant about what she was going to do once he came back and to hear that she understood why he had lied was baffling to him. To be fair, she had always been baffling to him, so it wasn't anything new. But things after that didn't make sense.

They were in each other's faces after the news about the Black Organization had come out. Ran was protective of Shinichi. Shinichi was protective of Ran. And they were getting on each others' nerves. He was used to flying solo or have Haibara with hi, when it came to cases, so when Ran interfered, he wasn't happy about it. Ran was used to some alone time when she could regroup herself after rollercoaster of a day and it irritated her when Shinichi was there as well.

And the bubble that they had enclosed themselves in burst that day.

 _"Ran, you need to stop meddling in my cases. This is getting annoying."_

 _"Excuse me? I am just helping you."_

 _"Yes, and I don't want your help. If I wanted help, I would have brought Haibara with me."_

That hurt her. And Shinichi knew that it would because she had talked about how easy it was for her to see Haibara and him as more of a equal than she and him would be. Ran _wanted_ to help him but Haibara _actually_ helped him. That wasn't to say that her input wasn't invaluable and he didn't appreciate what she did but Ran didn't have the medical knowledge. She was his Watson to his Holmes, in the sense that she provided him support and was there for him when he needed her but he didn't need her there with him on his cases all the time. And he would feel better if Ran wasn't in midst of a potential killer. He knew she could protect herself better than him, but that didn't stop him from worrying about her safety and he didn't word it right but that's what he felt that Haibara could help him more than Ran could.

For Ran, it was just the confirmation she was waiting for but was hoping against. She knew that he didn't mean it that way and she knew that it was unintentional and she knew how right he was but that didn't make the hurt less. So she walked away. Shinichi let her go knowing that he had a case to attend to and he made a promise to himself to talk to her when they were both relatively calm.

And while she walked, she thought. She remembered when he was Conan, she remembered how they were before Conan and while she was busy in her memories, rain came pouring down. She walked silently in the rain, mindless of the fact that her red T-shirt and blue jeans were getting wet and sticking to her body. She didn't care. She just wanted to know where they had gone wrong? She could see his reasonings but that didn't make her feel better. She was desperate to see only the logics, she didn't want to feel how his betrayal affected her but it was getting tough and each moment felt like a ticking bomb. All Shinichi had done as Conan came back with a vengeance. At that moment, she knew they couldn't stay the way they were. Something had to change, otherwise they would be destroyed. She knew that she wanted Shinichi as someone she could spend her life with and she knew she had to change somethings about her for her sake.

She didn't like the weakling she had become. She didn't like how dependent she had become on Shinichi for her happiness. She didn't like that she couldn't accept the fact that he didn't need her on a crime scene. She knew how hypocritical ot was. Just as Shinichi couldn't help her in karate, she couldn't help in crime solving. She knew that but Shinichi's disappearance had left such a scar on her that she was willing to do anything to stay close to him and she needed to change that. She wanted to become an independent individual. She didn't want to become a burden on anybody. She wanted to become stronger and she knew how to do that.

In her mind, she wanted Shinichi more than he did and she didn't want that. She wanted both of them to be on equal footing when it came to whatever their relationship was right now. Stuck somewhere knowing that they loved each other but still not ready to take the plunge.

Her resolve emboldened, she walked with more certainty in her footsteps. She now knew what she had to do and what she wanted to do. Now, she just needed to tell Shinichi. She was so busy in her thoughts that she didn't hear a voice calling out her name. She turned around to see Shinichi running towards her. And for the first time in two years, she felt a lightness in her heart that she thought would only feel after Shinichi had come back to her. In a sense, it was true, but she knew that it was bigger than that. That lightness in her heart she felt was due to herself and knowing Shinichi, he would agree to what she was about to say and so with a bright smile on her face and her wet clothes clinging to her, she spoke.

 **~oOo~**

Twenty eight year old Kudo Shinichi was a known private detective who could be seen almost everyday with the Tokyo Police Department. Some were even sure that he worked in the police department but the truth was that he worked _for_ the police, not _with_ them. He was a freelancer. It was true that he liked those hard, tough to crack cases but he was willing to help a person in need and if he wasn't interested, he would send them Mouri Kogoro's way. The old man could use some financial help. Well, not really, seeing how successful his daughter had become. Mouri Ran had opened up a non-profit organization for those people who were affected by crimes. They could be reformed ex-cons who were ready to turn their lives around but were getting rejected by companies. They could be people whose breadwinner in their families had died or gone to jail. Mouri Ran's organization was a ray of hope for people who were in complete darkness. Her family and friends volunteered to help as well, And more often than not, Kudo Shinichi could be seen talking to those people.

Many of them heckled him that he had just come for their beautiful CEO and Shinichi, now past all the awkward teenage years with all the quiet confidence that he had gained slowly after the Black Organization downfall, would tease them back, saying that he wouldn't be even seen associating with them if Ran wasn't there.

He wasn't embarrassed at all. He knew that there never could be anybody that he would love more than he loved Ran. He had always known that but Conan had been the catalyst of their emergence as well as downfall. Ran had told him that she didn't like how dependent she had become on him. And how she didn't feel strong and felt that both of them could do much better. He feared that she was going to break up with him, even though they weren't in a romantic relationship. They were in between. They had always been in between and Ran wanted to free herself from that. He couldn't fault her for that and as much as he wanted to say no to her being away from him, he could see the logic behind it. They were eighteen and yet, they had experienced something that most people in all their lifetime didn't. They needed to grow on their own before they be in a relationship. And so, he agreed. They were going back to being friends. But that in itself was ambiguous because they never had been _just friends._ It was stupid to think that either of them could just cut off the other from their life, it was just not possible. So, they made some conditions. They would stay in contact via phone. They would meet each other on a weekend to let the other know what had happened but not on other days. They would respect each other's boundaries and not interfere in their personal lives. If, any of them, found a boy or a girl, they were interested in, they could pursue them without any reservations. Neither of them liked that one but they agreed. They needed to know who they were on their own without the title of 'Shinichi's girlfriend/wife' or 'Ran's boyfriend/wife.'

And they started their adult lives that way. It was hard. The pull they had towards each other was too difficult to deny. Both of them had graduated from high school and had entered college in Tokyo. Their classes didn't match except for Psychology. One would think that it would be too difficult to stay in touch but it wasn't for them. They had been away from each other for so long, they weren't going to waste the opportunity to see the other. But they didn't deviate from the rules they had made for each other and themselves.

They could see little changes every weekend they met. Ran would talk about a new friend she made or one of her projects she had in class and Shinichi would talk to her about his cases and dumb things his friends had come up with. They had their own lives. They had their own identities. She would tell him new things that he never knew. He would tell her about things he had learned. They would spend one day together without any interruptions and they couldn't be happier.

The holes that Conan had put were being filled in and they were being filled by themselves. They weren't leaning on each other everyday for their survival. They wanted to be together because they _wanted_ to and not _needed_ to. They didn't think of each other everyday but that was okay, because they were slowly growing up. They weren't desperate to see or talk to each other. Ran had built a life for herself that didn't revolve around Shinichi and Shinichi had built a life that didn't revolve around Ran and for the first time in years, they were happy.

They would tiptoe around the subject of potential love interests though. Shinichi was happy to let Ran discover herself without him and just talk to her everyday for an hour and meet her one day of the week but he wasn't a masochist. He didn't want to know if there was anybody Ran was interested in. To be fair, Ran's idea worked for him as well. He had always been so invested in her that he couldn't see anybody beside her. And cases. But that was a different topic. And five years later, it was still the same. He really couldn't see anybody beside her. It wasn't as if he hadn't tried to. There were plenty of beautiful girls and boys and he had partied with them but he nobody could come close what Ran meant to him. He tried his best to make himself available. He owed himself to know whether Ran was the right person for him or not. And he came to the same conclusion he had when he was younger. He still loved Ran and now, he faced the same problem he faced years ago. Did Ran like him as well?

After building up his confidence and failing a few times, at the age of twenty three, he mustered up the courage to face Ran for the second time but she surprised him. Ran confessed her love to him first. They were on one of their solo meetings they always planned on the weekend. They had decided to take a trip to Osaka to meet Hattori and Kazuha. And Ran had looked beautiful that day. She had cut her long hair till it reached her neck and he would be the first person to admit that Ran looked beautiful in any way and form. She looked happier and confident as well and he was glad that they had made the decision to separate yet stay together. He would have missed out on her wonderful transformation.

And to nobody's surprise, there was a murder. By now, the four of them knew the drill. Shinichi and Hattori would solve the case and Ran and Kazuha would stay away. But the girls surprised the boys with their observant inputs. After all, Ran and Kazuha hadn't studied Psychology for nothing. Once the case was solved and Ran and Shinichi were back to Tokyo, Ran had invited him to her flat. Needless to say, both their faces had turned beet red after that. They hadn't crossed the line that defined their slightly different friendship and it made Shinichi nervous. He was going to be alone together with Ran without any onlookers. They always had their weekly meetings in a cafe or a park where they were people and it was always in broad daylight, never in the evening.

With his heart stuck in his throat, he followed her up. He was ridiculously nervous and that was laughable. He had lived together with Ran for two years straight, he had seen her naked for god's sake. Why was he so nervous? But then again, everything was different back then. He didn't know how it was but it just was different. He was sitting on the coffee coloured couch before he knew it. A part of his mind was checking out her home and he could see how it suited Ran. The colours were soft but bold and the home gave off a warm feeling. It reminded him of her room back in Detective Agency but this one was better. It was like a Ran 2.0 version.

The Ran 2.0 version thoroughly surprised and elated him when she confessed her love. And the fact that she didn't date anybody else because she couldn't see anybody else. He wagered he would never forget that line.

And that was it. It took them twenty three years to become an official couple. Even they felt they had been a couple for much more longer than that. It took them heartbreak, epiphanies, jealousy, happiness, sadness, self hatred and love to get them where they were right now.

Mouri Ran as a successful CEO of _Together As One_ non-profit organization and Kudo Shinichi as a private detective. Both of them happy and content to know that they had chosen to be together and whatever happened, they were going to support each other in whatever decision the other made for their lives. And right now, Kudo Shinichi just hoped that Mouri Ran wouldn't be averse to being Kudo Ran as the ring in his pocket that he had been carrying for weeks was burning a hole through it.

It all had come full circle. The venues might have been different. And it might have taken ten years too long to come to a place they should have been but at that moment, there were no doubts, no apprehension. Shinichi was sure that what he wanted was Ran and he was confident enough in his relationship to admit that he made her happy as well. Now they just needed to make it official.

With a deep breath and a confident knock on the door that had _Mouri Ran_ written on simple black and white plate, he entered the room that would be a witness to his new life as a married man.

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 **A/N: That's it. Hmm, this wasn't as uncomplicated as I thought it would be. I wanted some happiness when it has been such a bad few days for me. Don't think I succeeded. Whatever.**


End file.
